Timing is Everything

Often times it's not until the opportunity has long since come and gone that we're kicking ourselves in the ass for not taking it. As of late it's been a reoccurring theme in my life; I can't seem to make up my mind, that is until something has occurred to make the decision for me, and here I am left wondering, is this what I really wanted?  But it doesn't matter, does it? Because I am the world's worst decision maker and tend to sit back and let things play themselves out, having recently realized that more than 50% of the time I am not satisfied with the results. So why is it that, despite knowing this, I continue to do it? I mean, what's so difficult about a little risk every now and then? But that's exactly it, for some God awful reason I cannot bring myself to do a single thing, convinced it's 'better' to be safe than sorry. I'm really starting to understand this isn't the case for some things, though.

Contrary to the popular saying 'it's better to be safe than sorry' is another quote that is something along the lines of, it is better to have given something a try only to find out that it wouldn't or couldn't work out than to live the rest of your life wondering 'what if.' Thus, I'm beginning to reconsider my thought process. How many more missed opportunities will it take for me to just throw caution to the wind and forget about the consequences for the time being, because, in all actuality, I do know what I want a majority of the time, it's just that I'm too scared to go after it for fear that it'll turn out to be everything I've been waiting for. Makes sense, right? WRONG. The only thing that makes sense is that I talk a big game but take little initiative in going after what I really want; waiting for things to just magically fall into my lap. Wishful thinking.

In addition to my being the worst decision maker, I am also one of the most confusing individuals. One second I'm sure that, without a doubt, I don't want something, but as soon as I see someone else with it, my brain finally breaks free from this wall of lies that I've built up around it, telling me I'm an idiot. 

When it comes down to it, I need to stop lying to myself. So what if I look like a fool? At least I took a chance. I'd rather live life on the edge than spend my time taking up too much space with all of my worries.

Easier said than done, however. Everybody's gotta learn things on there own, I'm just hoping that in admitting my wrongs, I can make the right changes so that I'm not left wishing that was me.

Timing is everything.